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Smile, You're on Camera - Team EWE

Title: Smile, You’re on Camera
Team: Team EWE
Author: bewarethesmirk
Prompt: The Devil
Wordcount: ~14,000
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: A bit of Harry/Ginny but nothing serious or explicit.
Summary: Harry Potter has lost sight of what it means to listen to himself—he’s depressed and confused, moving through life only to please the Ministry and the press and his friends. One day he wakes up on a train next to Draco Malfoy and that all changes.
Author's Note Thank you so much to Team Sheep and all who betaed. Thanks to other people who helped when they didn’t even have a stake on this team.



Smile, You're on Camera


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Comments

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WOW. So, so entertaining. Funny as hell, too. I haven't been able to stop giggling since the first word. :D

First of all:
"Honestly, I'm not sure, but what's important to remember about the Devil is that it's more about you and what you need to overcome."

I think you just put everything into perspective there. I particularly like your interpretation of The Devil because this one, I personally can somehow relate to it.

And then...

Kreacher waved an impatient, gnarled hand. "I is not caring about that! Kreacher wants to desecrate them to smithereens!"

Kreacher is absolute LOVE. <3 I will never tire of Kreacher!

What Harry had read in Malfoy's eyes earlier was back again. "You fell in love with me." and "Oh, God," Harry whispered. "Oh, God."

I love these to pieces as well. So adorable...

Basically I absolutely adore Harry in this story so, so much. When he's supposedly "drooling", when he walks into the Ministry wearing the velvet robe with a vengeance and when he's trying to take Kreacher and Luna seriously... everything about him here makes me want to take him into my arms and hug him for being so cute. And although Draco stalking Harry to take his pictures was actually kind of predictable, it definitely didn't lessen the enjoyment of reading the denouement for me. The cheeky ending is also very lovely and makes for a very satisfying conclusion.

This one I'm definitely saving and reccing!
Early on, rospberry linked me a rec you made in your LJ that made me very happy. :) Nervous as I was about posting this fic, it was wonderful to have such a great response.

That being said, this fic was written as well as I could in a rush. I'm working with some great betas to edit what I have and to write more plot and a more satisfactory ending for both Harry and Draco, for me, and hopefully, the readers. :)

I was amazed at how much humor turned up in this fic. I meant to sneak in a few funny lines, but some of the characters (Kreacher, Luna, for ex.) took over!

I'm glad you felt attached to Harry; I did, too. I <3 Harry. And I'm also glad you liked my take on The Devil. The Devil in my prompt was that bit of us we all have--some people more than others. :P

Thanks for your thoughtful observations! If you'd ever like to keep track of my fic, or the updated version of this fic, feel free to friend me. My journal is f-locked. :P
I loved this story. Soo well written, and your Harry was absolutely perfect. That little "g-gay" and "not, not, not" was just so charming. Ginny's "I know" was wonderful, too, the double meaning Harry couldn't understand. I liked how Draco was almost two people, knowing and confident, and honest and vulnerable. Just a couple of itty bitty quibbles. I think you were too explicit in stating Harry's serving of others. The situation spoke for itself, but you kept repeating what was going on (though I did love that "bitch" line). Also, keeping in mind Harry's bewilderment throughout the story, I found his sudden knowledge about Draco's love (though I very much enjoyed his response), and his confidence in asking for the blow job, a bit too quick of a turnaround. But overall, I very much enjoyed your story. It was a very nice read, with a good plot, and wonderful characterizations.
I love received comments from people on my f-list. *g* Thank you for your insightful feedback, both kind and observant and intelligent in its concrit.

This fic was rushed, and I'm taking the time to slash (heh) the ending and write more, while editing the rest of the fic. I'm taking your comments, in particular, into account, particularly:

- think you were too explicit in stating Harry's serving of others. The situation spoke for itself, but you kept repeating what was going on...

Definitely. Classic show vs. tell problem.

-I found his sudden knowledge about Draco's love (though I very much enjoyed his response), and his confidence in asking for the blow job, a bit too quick of a turnaround.

Thanks so much for reading and your wonderful words. ♥
I never thought of Draco as a paparazzi, but you made it work. Him quitting his job because he didn't like it was very Draco-like, but I wondered a bit about Lucius disinheriting him. Was it because he quite the job, or did he find out about him being gay?
I loved Kreacher and I wish we could have seen more of him (especially once he found out Draco was the one behind it :))
Harry's understanding of Draco's feelings for him was a bit sudden, but considering what it led to, I can't complain :)

Forgive me being so late in replying to hd_worldcup comments. ♥ I'm trying to catch up!

I'm planning a major edit and rewrite of this fic, so your questions will be very useful to say the least.

...but I wondered a bit about Lucius disinheriting him. Was it because he quite the job, or did he find out about him being gay?

When I was writing the fic, I was imagining it being because of Draco's sexual orientation, but that seems a bit cliche to me. I may make that part of the reason, but in the edit I'll provide more backstory about why Lucius disinherited Draco. Or I might cut that altogether. Lucius cares too much about maintaining the Malfoy line.

I agree with you that Harry's recognition of Draco's feelings were too soon, as well as Harry so easily forgiving Draco's stalking of him. I skipped about 10,000 words of making up and UST and Draco worming his way into Harry's heart. ♥

Thanks!
Heh. I really enjoyed this story. Your (or rather Luna's) interpretation of the card set it up well, and I love how the store clerk had a devil tattooed on the back of her head (nice touch). That one moment when Draco spoke to Ginny, and she acknowledged what he said? Very nice. Even in the midst of disliking each other, Ginny heard what he had to say, even if Harry didn't.

Harry ... is so lovable, clueless, and desperate not to follow along like a sheep (baaah), but he tries so hard NOT to be someone he's not that he simply becomes another person he's not. Yay for Draco showing him the way.

Go Team EWE!
Thanks so much for your kind comments. I'm particularly glad you liked my Luna's interpretation of the Devil.
A lot of fun to read. Somewhat clueless Harry is a treat and Draco w/glasses always is. The wearing of the robes to work was hilarious. I enjoyed it a lot, but Harry at the end caught me off guard. I really didn't expect him to order Draco to go down on him right after accepting that he might just be gay. Not that it wasn't hot.
Yeah, I had to include glasses!Draco. :-P

Yeah, Harry at the end caught me off guard, too, in retrospect. Which is why I'm re-editing and rewriting much of the fic and esp. the ending.

Thanks so much for reading and for sharing honest comments.
Mmm... very nice. I like how you painted Harry so well in his pathetic state and I adore Draco in a Muggle suit. *G* I did like the idea of Draco following Harry around and getting to know him, I think Harry need that. I am interested in why Draco was disowned, though. *ponders*
Thanks so much for reading. :)

I am interested in why Draco was disowned, though. *ponders*

You know, I wrote in another comment that I think this seems too cliche. I think Lucius would care too much about the Malfoy line to disinherit Draco over his sexuality or his career choice or whatever. I think in my major revamp of this fic (which is underway) that'll be cut.
This was a whole lot of fun! Things I loved: Ron and Hermione attempting to help Harry, Ron's bluntness, Draco's vulnerability at the end, Draco in glasses (always hot!), Harry's adorable cluelessness, Ginny's quiet I know, the hotness at the end...

AND...We don't actually think you're gay, Harry, and we won't until you tell us otherwise. Oh, Hermione...that cracked me up!

AND!!! Kreacher waved an impatient, gnarled hand. "I is not caring about that! Kreacher wants to desecrate them to smithereens!"
Too funny!

Great fic!
Thanks so much for reading! I'm doing a major edit of this fic considering it was written in too much of a hurry and there are parts of it, in retrospect, that scream "OOC!" to me. It helps to know what readers like. I think the secondary characters in this story almost worked better than the actual H/D. For instance, a lot of people liked Kreacher, Luna, and the Trio's interactions. It's good to have some stronger bits to work with.

Great story.

Draco as a paparazzi is definitely something I haven't read before. And I think it was very Draco-like to quit his job because he didn't like it!
Oh, and I really liked your Ginny!

And this line:
We don't actually think you're gay, Harry, and we won't until you tell us otherwise.
soo funny!

Really enjoyed it!

Draco as a paparazzi is definitely something I haven't read before.


I'm glad to hear! It's hard to find an unwritten trope in this fandom. :D

Thanks so much for reading, and I'm glad you enjoyed it!
Ditto what Allika wrote.
allika had great comments, so thanks to you as well. ;-) Love the username, too. *g*
a fun story. draco as paparazzi that falls in love with his victim? priceless. and i like your portrayal of hermione and ron. my one quibble was that the style seemed a bit sloppy, in both writing and characterization.
Thanks for reading and for your comments.

I'm in the process of considering feedback and using it to edit my fic. The ending was rushed, so I'm going to be cutting off the ending and adding a lot more. :P

So, when you say:

my one quibble was that the style seemed a bit sloppy, in both writing and characterization.

That's a bit broad. It's been almost two months since you commented, but if you remember anything in particular about the writing and/or characterization , let me know. In addition, if you beta and want to help, feel free. :D Haha, but barring that, thanks so much for your comments. They're very useful.
Despite some awkward parts and misspellings, I liked it - starting with the very apt title, which, after having read this fic, now makes me smile, down to the very last line. This story's charm and debonair humour, coupled with some insightful realizations, have completely enchanted me *g* ♥

And you had some really witty lines and funny remarks that made me laugh out loud *g*
Thanks so much! I'm editing the fic, so that'll help with the misspellings and the awkwardness. ;-) It's what I get for writing a fic at the last second.
I LOVED this. It is AMAZING… my favorite part was when Harry realizes that Draco loves him! Somehow, "Oh, God" seems like the perfect response. <3 <3 <3

You've got quite a few typos in this though- You should read it over, especially if you're considering posting this somewhere else when the competition is over.
I'm glad you enjoyed it! I'm doing a big edit (which will no doubt include SPAG) so all those pesky typos will be fixed!
It was really entertaining and funny. I wasn't sure that the stalker is Draco until the end, which I probably liked the best. I liked Harry being completely dumb when it comes to fashion. And Kreacher is love;)
Thanks so much! Lots of people seem to like Kreacher. ;) I do a mean grumpy house-elf, apparently.
My first thoughts: Poor Harry...XD

Final thoughts: LUCKY HARRY! >=(

If only we could all have stalkers like Draco. Great fic.
Thanks!

(Nice username *g*)
I agree with the previous comments regarding plot and character development... but you know what? I really enjoyed it regardless. It felt lighter, even with the more serious topics, and it was fun to read. (I read this while waiting for something and it made the time fly by.)
I'm glad you enjoyed it! I'm going to edit and write a lot more, so hopefully it'll be a better read for it.
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